seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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