Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
All I want is dick and wine.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Your penis caused this!
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
