Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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