How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
