I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I intend to get homeless drunk
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize