Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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