I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
