I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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