Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
