I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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