try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
