CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
