I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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