your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
