Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
