She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
