Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Randomize