just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
