talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
