Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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