It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
