super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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