So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
you traded sex for a burrito?
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Randomize
