i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
