were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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