just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
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