Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
