She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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