I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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