Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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