I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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