dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
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