Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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