her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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