He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
