she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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