I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
