Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
