yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
