I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
