My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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