Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
What drink are we having for lunch?
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
