i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
