I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
