I love black thongs
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
