new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Less talking, more tequila
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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