How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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