summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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