yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
