Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
